An Open Apology to Baby-Bump Bloggers

halle-berry-prengant.jpg angelina-baby-bump.jpgHello all! Susan here with my TWIST (The Way I See Things.) Not long ago I questioned why bloggers and media made such a fuss about celebrity pregnancy. Are they pregnant? Can we see the baby bump? Is it twins? Are they hiding it behind gowns with layers of flowing fabric? Who’s throwing the baby shower? Who was there? What kind of baby favors did they give the guests? Angelina Jolie was the most recent to get the blog third-degree. I wondered why the famous aren’t allowed some privacy, especially when it comes to something as personal as conceiving, carrying and delivering a baby. Naively, I blamed a pop culture-obsessed society whose lives are so uneventful that they have to live vicariously through celebrities. I now know the whole depressing truth, and it’s disheartening, but not surprising.

To those of you I wrongly accused, please accept my sincere apology. The rumors don’t start with you–they start with the stars themselves, or their publicity machines to be exact. The rumors, the photos, everything begins as an opportunity for publicists to exploit their clients with the goal of inflating their stardom and popularity.jlo-bump.jpg

His Seed Isn’t The Only Thing That’s Planted

According to Mosnar Communications, Inc. in Atlanta, GA, “stars have an excellent opportunity to turn pregnancy rumors into positive publicity coverage.” The reason, and this makes sense, is that most fans can relate to pregnancy and are fascinated to learn that their favorite celebrities are expecting. The coverage, they say, can lead to higher stardom ranking and Hollywood list ranking. “In Hollywood, pregnancy is a huge event…using public relations to communicate with the public about pregnancy allows stars to stay fresh in the minds and thoughts of fans.”

momgraterm.jpg So now we know how the baby-bump rumors really get started. And again, I apologize for ragging on the fans. The publicists lead the fans to “water,” and the fans drink willingly, waiting anxiously for their favorite celeb’s “water” to break. And now that I know the phenomenal effect that pregnancy has on a female celebrity’s career, I can’t help but wonder if some of these pregnancies are not just planned, but calculated to revive flagging popularity.

 A C-Section, A Nanny–What’s So Hard?

Before you drop by to swat me viciously with your People magazine, I clearly said “some of these pregnancies.” It’s irresponsible to generalize about the actions of any group of people, but when the simple (and pleasurable!) act of getting pregnant can have such a profound effect on both career and income, it’s not a stretch to believe that at least a few of these ego-driven divas see pregnancy as a “can’t miss” publicity stunt–even for the stars who are married!

starbottlestopper1.jpg Out here in the real world, women get pregnant because 1) they’re married and ready to start a family, 2) they’re not married, but they want children and are financially able to raise them, 3) they’re not married, not ready to start a family and not responsible enough to use protection or 4) they want as many children as possible so they can manipulate the welfare system. Among Hollywood celebrities, the first three apply, but here’s their 4) they’re in need of a nine-month boost in popularity, which they play for all it’s worth until, boom, A Star Is Born…

If you disagree with me, please let me know. I have a sneaking suspicion I won’t get one comment from any of you!